Cravings.

I have never had a sweet tooth. I like dark chocolate and raw cacoa, I don't go much on ice cream or lollies and would prefer to drink water than juice. But, since being pregnant all that has changed. Early on in my pregnancy all I wanted was lollies and juice. I became fiercely protective of my Milk Bottle supply and even wanted ice cream sundaes. My sister speculated that my sudden sweet tooth was because I was having a girl. I dismissed this straight away. I was sure I was having another boy.
I had my boys names picked, a cupboard full of boys clothes and a house full of boyish toys. Two boys. I had it all planned. A life of soccer, trucks, dragons and duelling in the backyard. I even started referring to 'the boys', meaning my four year old, Hamish, and the new baby. It was going to be easy.
I was wrong. My sister was right. I'm having a girl. At first I was thrilled. I just wasn't expecting it. Then I was scared by the unknown. What about all my boys clothes and toys? What about my favourite boys names? What about Hamish and his want for a brother? Could a brother and sister be as close as two brothers?
Now I'm back to being thrilled. Hamish has embraced the news. He says we can get girly 'weapons' for duelling (I'm not so sure), and that a room decorated with bats and butterflies would be great (again, not so sure). He has even mentioned changing his name to Charlie so we can call the baby Lola.
I have bought a couple of pink items, and I'm looking forward to having 'a pigeon pair'. I'm still not sure about names, but have put a list on the fridge and have started yelling random girls names out to see how they sound. My Husband and I figure this is the best way of choosing a name – we are constantly yelling 'HAMISH', so if we yell names and still like them, it must be love.
My top five boys names: Edward (Ned, on playful days), George, Hugh, Stirling and Atticus.

The photo is from my 12 week scan.

New.

Last week my nephew was born. The day had come for his arrival and we waited anxiously for news. We waited and waited. As we waited it brought back memories of the birth of my own son, making me wish I could birth my nephew for my sister. That way I could be in control and not feel so stressed and I could save my love from the ordeal of birth. But, as I was going over this in my head, I realised that giving birth is a life changing experience I wouldn't want my sister to miss out on. It is rewarding and amazing and overwhelming (and painful). It pushes you to your limits and when it's all over you are in awe of what your body can do and feel an amazing sense of achievement.
Birth is a miracle, and it was highlighted to me again last week. My nephew had a dramatic start to life, but everyday he has astounded me with his resilience. Babies truly are amazing.